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So on the M Sport - yes it is just the appearance and that is generally true across most of the BMW range - on pretty much all models you can spec M Sport suspension or Active Suspension & bigger wheels and that gives you the same dynamics. So it is all down to whether you prefer the M Sport look - personally I do on these later cars - I did spec a 2008 335d as SE and then add all the M Sport options just to avoid the black roof lining, but on that car it was more spot the difference on the external appearance so I wasn't fussed with it...
So I'm probably not going to help you here as I do like the top view - great for parking straight/avoiding kerbs with your 19'' wheels! (Although the rest of that pack is pretty redundant for me.) I also always spec ACC as I spend most of my time on the highway. I believe most BMWs come with the Performance Control as standard but it doesn't do anything to the chassis set up unless you order order DHP/Active suspension. I have DHP/VSS but to be honest it pretty much always stays in Comfort.
Over here we have M Sport & M Sport Plus - which adds in the M Sport brakes (& other stuff) - assuming they do make a difference to standard (never tried a GT car without them) I'd say they are almost essential as I wouldn't want weaker brakes. Probably best to leave it to someone your side of the pond to comment more as the specs we get are quite different - plus I ordered mine before the LCI & I know things have changed... But in your shoes - just go with everything M Sport + ACC + Top View and negotiate harder - we're getting 20%+ discounts on top end GTs...No chance of regrets that way - which would be crazy if you've just spent $60k...
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